I’ve spoken at dozens of schools and libraries, but I’ve never been invited to speak at a brew pub. This should be fun!
Category Archives: Musings
What Are Your Three Most Formative Books?
On my daily walks I’ve been listening to a podcast called “3 Books with Neil Pasricha”. In each episode Neil interviews an interesting, articulate, (and usually famous) person and they discuss the three books that have been the most formative in that person’s life. The book choices spark some really interesting conversations that often spiral in many directions. And isn’t that what books are supposed to do?
Neil asks his guests to choose books that changed their lives in some significant way- steering them in a different direction or opening their eyes to new ideas. Often a book from childhood is cited as a formative book, as well as one from their early adult years. I’ve discovered some amazing titles by listening to these interviews. I’ve also spent time considering what my own three most formative books would be.
I’ve always been an avid reader. In my childhood home we could choose to read or do chores. It was a no-brainer for me. (Thanks mom, for turning me into a reader.) But selecting just three books over my lifetime is hard. The following are the first ones that jump to mind. By tomorrow it might be an entirely different list. Continue reading
Messy First Draft
It’s done, that messy first draft of my first full length novel for an adult audience. I’ve lost track of when I began the journey, it was at least 3 years ago, probably more. Now I’m smoothing the rough edges, massaging it, trying to get a sense of whether it works as a whole and is not just a bunch of disconnected scenes. Does it even reveal the story I set out to tell?
When it’s as polished as I can make it I’ll ask for feedback from my writing critique group. Their responses will likely give me more to think about, probably resulting in additional rewriting. And that’s when the really challenging part begins; finding an agent and/or a publisher. My connections are in the world of children’s literature. This is a whole new arena.
Running just below the surface is that inner battle I constantly face – is this the best use of my time? Of my life? Will this book even see the light of day, and if it does, will reading it engage, entertain and be thought-provoking for its intended audience? Continue reading
On becoming Mother-of-the-Bride
At any given time we can each describe ourselves with a number of different labels. In my life I was first called daughter, sister and niece. Then I became friend, student, girlfriend, fiancé, teacher, wife, aunt, mother, author. Now I can add one more, at least for a short time: mother-of-the-bride.
Danny and Dani’s engagement photo
Mother-of-the-bride. What is my role in my daughter’s wedding preparations? At one time a wedding was an event where the parents of the bride (and lesser so the groom) threw a party to invite their friends to celebrate in the marriage of their daughter. Now brides and grooms have taken over the planning and the tendency is to throw themselves a celebration, possibly with some help from the parents. This change probably came about when couples began choosing to live together before marrying – often for years – so the wedding is more of a formality, a chance for the couple to declare their love and intention to remain together, always. They’ve already created a home and life together which is different than it once was. As the mother-of-the-bride I look forward to the parties, the planning, the preparation (I surprised myself by embracing the wedding dress shopping!) but my role has certainly become more of a background player than it would have been in years gone by. Continue reading
Consistent, Persistent & Insistent
In the research I’ve been doing on trans youth, I’ve discovered that one of the ways professionals recognize a transgender child is if they have been consistent, persistent and (possibly) insistent on their cross-gender identification.
This list of rhyming words came back to me predawn this morning as I lay in bed dealing with my wide-awake cat. (Jim has dubbed her ‘Cat Annoyance’). She has a very sweet nature, is loving and affectionate, but not at appropriate times!
Too early every day she starts to head-butt, purr loudly and clamour all over me.
“You slept all day yesterday,” I growl at her. “It’s my turn to sleep now .” I drop her to the floor, but she consistently, persistently and insistently jumps back up and starts the routine again. If I lock her out of my room she cries (yup, you guessed it ) consistently, persistently and insistently at the door.
It’s a good list of words, helpful for gender therapists and trans youth. It’s also very descriptive of my cat.
Has anyone found a solution to silence an early-waking cat? (And no, please don’t suggest I get up earlier!)
Season of Symbols
I posted the following message years ago but I think it bears repeating…I’ve never been much of a ‘Christmas’ person. There are just too many expectations at this time of year and most of these things I’m not good at. If I had my way, I’d ‘unplug the Christmas machine’ and create simple, family-centered traditions that wouldn’t include shopping malls or racing from one event to another. However, when it comes to Christmas, I don’t have my way.
But….
A couple of years ago I came across a list of Seasonal Strategies written by Harold Rosen who was then the minister of the North Shore Unitarian Church. With this list, Harold invites us to “look behind the all-too-familiar things, and see the Larger Reality they represent.” I review this list at the start of each Christmas season and I’m now far more successful at keeping my “mental and spiritual health intact.”
I offer Harold’s list here, an early Yuletide gift for anyone who takes the time to read my blog.
May your ramp-up to Christmas be only as frantic as you wish it to be.
Season Of Symbols
Gifts – they are more than stuffed boxes covered with shiny paper and ribbons; they are tangible tokens of all those thoughtful things we wanted to ‘do’ for our loved ones and friends, all year long, but never got around to it.
Cards – the are more than donations to Hallmark and overtime pay for the postal service; they are humble hints of the much we’d like to say if only time, emotional strength and eloquence abounded.
Lights – they are more than electrical fire hazards and jobs for the handy-person in our midst; they conquer the darkness of season and soul with a glimpse of celestial spendour.
Carols – they are more than memory-markers and excuses for extra choir rehearsals; they are auditory proof that heaven is nigh, and that the layers of tradition can heal the layers of our pain.
Angels – they are more than plastic ornaments on trees… they are those whispers we hear just in time, saying “you have what it takes.’ ‘Good deeds can be fun.’ ‘Things pass, but Love abides’ and ‘all will turn out well, despite appearances.’
Happy Holidays!
Tsundoku: The practice of buying more books than you can read
Doku: reading
Tsun: to pile up
Tsundoku: the piling up of reading things
I know people who have wardrobes full of beautiful clothes, kitchens stocked with polished cookware, living rooms decked out in elegant, matching furniture and artwork. In their tidy closets they have racks lined with rows of exquisite shoes, just the right ones for every occasion. As much as I might like to have these things, that’s not what’s in my home. Nope. In my home I have bookshelves groaning under stacks of books. More books than I’ll ever get around to reading. Dusty books. New books. Old books. Children’s books. Novels. Non-fiction. Memoir. Classics. Textbooks.
Many of these books are library books. They will have to be returned before they’re read even though I renew them as often as I’m allowed. The problem is, as well as being a master of tsundoku, I’m also a voracious reader of book reviews. I keep a journal of titles that I MUST someday read, so when I see them at bookstores or at the library I ‘acquire’ them and add them to the stacks.
And I do read – as much as I can. But there is never going to be enough time to read all the books I’ve accumulated.
There are worse things to practice than tsundoku. I could be hoarding a collection of troll dolls or dead house plants. But I may have found a solution for my unruly collection: the Little Free Library.
Slowly I’ve been weeding through the stacks of books that I own and finding ones that I feel I can part with. I keep a bag of them in my car and whenever I pass a Little Free Library I drop a few off. (The hard part is resisting the urge to also bring a few more home.) Maybe someday I’ll have tidy, book free coffee and bedside tables and organized, uncluttered shelves. And nice shoes.
And then again, maybe not.
“Even when reading is impossible, the presence of books acquired produces such an ecstasy that the buying of more books than one can read is nothing less than the soul reaching towards infinity.” A. Edward Newton, author, publisher, and collector of 10,000 books.
Image credit :http://mocomi.com/tsundoku/
Little Free Library
“Take a book, share a book.”
I remember the day I stumbled across this Little Free Library. It was the first one I’d ever seen. It stands in a yard a few neighbourhoods away from my own, but one that I can easil
y walk to. I thought it was absolutely charming although, perhaps, poorly named. (Aren’t all libraries free?) Anyway, I immediately began ‘taking and sharing’. Often I leave copies of my own titles.
I learned this week that Todd Bol – founder of Little Free Library – has passed away. He started the trend in 2009 with the first Little Free Library in his own front yard. Before his death last week there were 75,000 Little Free Libraries worldwide. I expect this number is modest as people are creating their own designs, with wonderful results.
Before his death, Bol said, “If I may be so bold, I’m the most successful person I know because I stimulate 54 million books to be read and neighbours to talk to each other. As far as I’m concerned, that’s the very definition of success.”
I absolutely agree!
A Sunset Industry?
I read 3 opinions this week (re the controvercial oil pipelines in BC) that really spoke to me.
1. “It is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends on his not understanding it.” (Upton Sinclair)
2. “Buying this pipeline is like buying a horse and buggy company at the advent of the car.” (Andrew Weaver)
3. “Why is our government subsidizing a sunset industry rather than doubling down on cleaner renewables. Renewable energy and clean technology create more jobs per dollar than pipelines.” (David Suzuki Foundation)
I guess it’s easy to see which side of the fence I sit on, though I know the issue is huge and complicated.
We Shape The World
We shape the world –
By what we consume.
By what we give.
By the questions we ask.
By what we stand for.
By what we won’t.
We shape the world –
By taking the time to make
Thoughtful decisions.
Supporting artists and makers
Because we want a world
That supports artists and makers.
We shape the world –
By consuming less.
By buying it only if we love it.
And using it for years to come.
By mending it when it’s broken, and
Someday passing it along to become
Someone else’s beloved treasure.
(As seen on a storefront in Deep Cove, BC)
